Pillow Talk | Foreplay's Afterplay
For ages, we couldn't get anyone to stop talking about the importance of foreplay because there was proof that it genuinely improved sexual experience- all that kissing and touching gets your heart racing and giddy, works up that apetite and primes your neighbors for the uncomfortable noises that follow.
Now it seems we maybe equally unable to keep anyone quiet about another step...pillow talk!
Pillow talk has been proven to save marriages and prolong life. I joke not...
For ages, we couldn't get anyone to stop talking about the importance of foreplay because there was proof that it genuinely improved sexual experience- all that kissing and touching gets your heart racing and giddy, works up that apetite and primes your neighbors for the uncomfortable noises that follow.
Now it seems we maybe equally unable to keep anyone quiet about another step...pillow talk!
Pillow talk has been proven to save marriages and prolong life. I joke not.
What is pillow talk? According to the Cambridge dictionary, pillow talk is defined as a conversation between sexual partners in bed.
How easy is that? Just talk to each other right after! Well, these days, most people find out there is a third member involved in their sexual experience, preventing these intimate chats--cell phones. Hey, Instastories!
I hate to be the bearer of bad news but picking up your phone right after scoring, is not the most ideal way to build a romantically functional relationship. Does anyone say "scoring" anymore? Yes. Me.
According to Psychology Today, the acceptable process for any action that can be described as sex, should follow the following sequence: foreplay, penetration, intercourse, orgasm, pillow talk, maybe sleep. Usually in that order, no steps skipped and no cell phones, otherwise, what are you doing?
Each step is uniquely important, but pillow talk is now being researched extensively, as the importance of post-coital communication comes to light.
This study shows that people who pillow-talked after sex felt more secure and were happier. The average time for this effect was 15 minutes of pillow talk. The study showed also that if the time exceeded 15 minutes there was a even higher level of trust, security and relationship satisfaction reported.
What's the science behind pillow talking?Â
According to Professor Denn of the University of Connecticut, oxytocin, our favorite hormone (for obvious reasons) plays a huge role in facilitating pillow talk. Oxytocin is released when orgasm occurs (hence, obvious reason) and is known to trigger pro-social behaviors, making us happy and chatty, which most often results in pillow talk. Note, men are generally less chatty because testosterone dampens the effect of oxytocin but I can guarantee they will be more than happy to have pillow talks that are about more sex. Those crazy Martians. Tsk.
It's definitely worth noting that alcohol consumption also dampens the effect of oxytocin. It's like the ultimate anti-cuddle factor; so take it easy on the wine before sex. More pillow talk inhibitors are Instagram, sleep and kids... Side eye at all three. Kidding, love the kids. Nonetheless, they have to respect cuddle time.
So orgasm, check. Oxytocin, check. Pillow talk, check. Pillow talk is an important step. It should not be replaced by sleep or phone prodding. It improves relationships significantly because it's a rare form of intimate communication, which blends vulnerability in with trust and happiness. It leads to closeness, trust and relationship satisfaction, thanks to oxytocin, our bestie.
So instead of reaching over for your phone, let it charge for an extra 20 minutes. Let oxytocin do its work, Snapchat can wait.
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What are your thoughts on pillow talk? I'd really love to know!Â
Crop-Top-o-phobia: The Fear of crop tops
Last Summer, I tried wearing crop-tops for the first time and rightly so because we were in Vegas, baby! And it was hot, baby. *Straight face* Very hot. They should have been handing out crop-tops at the airport!
Anyway, I suggested in this post that the best way to get over the dread of crop-tops is to wear it with high-waist bottoms. I still stand by that suggestion. If you are thinking about baring some tummy but are a little hesitant, try a high-waist bottom, it works wonders for your confidence and as I advised someone on Twitter, also works wonders for preventing mosquitoes from feasting on your bare midriff, assuming you live in the tropics!
Although, I think the whole point of crops is to expose your glistening, toned midriff, baby steps are required for some of us.
How to wear a crop successfully
Get rid of added sugars and limit your carb intake. Yes, you can! I just drank a latte without adding any sugar. Was it gross? Yes, indeed! Was it a decision that would help me get an even midriff and be rid of my bashfulness? Oh, yes indeed! Studies show that reducing your sugar intake gets rid of tummy fat more effectively than tummy exercises! Who knew?!
Also, switching your meal proportions around help a great deal. Let your proteins and vegetables make up at least two-thirds of your meal, and carbs, a little less than a third; which implies that my edikaikong and assorted meats should be more than my Garri/Eba.
Hey, ever tried wearing a crop-top? Do you love it or does it make you feel like food for the 'quitoes? How do you maintain a toned core? Have you ever tried cutting sugar out of your diet?
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Cold/Flu Hack: Homemade Lemon Ginger Honey Tea
This infusion recipe is probably one of the best things that happened to me in 2015 and a great healthy habit that i quickly imbibed without blinking! Imagine a combo of three Superfoods; ginger, lemon and honey! That's a triple punch of antibacterial, anti-fungal and antioxidant properties that fight colds and sore throats, prevent cancers, aid digestion, flush out toxins, all the while tasting so good. It's perfect for any weather; perfect for that moment when your tummy starts growling at midnight and you know you should steer away from that carb-heavy jollof rice; perfect for recovering from your post lunchtime food-coma; perfect for kicking the flu and colds in the mid-area!
What you need
Lemon juice (1 1/2 tablespoons)
Ginger (chopped into 6-8 fingers)
Honey
Hot water
Step 1
Place chopped ginger in a teapot or mug and add hot water. Steep for about 10 minutes. [For a stronger flavor, boil ginger in two cups of water.]
Step 2
Extract your lemon juice
Step 3
Combine ginger infusion and lemon juice in a mug
Step 4
Add honey!
That's all! Just sip away. It's so easy and the ingredients are easy to get! That cold will think twice next time. If you've made too much (like there's any such thing), store in the fridge. You can always heat it up later.
You should also try it cold. I haven't tried it, because i'm more of a heat-seeker but my friend says it's epic! Try it out and tell us how it went! Enjoy!
