Mary’s Story: Script Flip

If you’ve ever been pregnant, or if you ever read that pamphlet your doctor gave you on that awkward day in front of your parents, you’d know that pregnancy is pretty much contingent on the Law of Cause and Effect. There’s just no other way. If perchance you are with child, then only you, God and Billy know what you have been up to.

There was one woman who did not obey this law, however, her name was Mary. She was not about this law at all. She defied probably every obstetrics/gynecology principle ever known to medicine. Many have tried to claim this same scientific defiance as the reason for their own mysterious pregnancies but ahem, c’mon…there’s always a Billy in there somewhere.

Mary was a virgin, promised in marriage to a carpenter called Joe. There was no cause in that relationship, but she got a fine load of effect. She is visited by an angel who tells her she will have a son as a virgin. 

Fast forward to present-day, everyone loves Mary; she was pure and chosen. She is always portrayed as this obedient, dove-like, scarfed woman with a modest look on her face in bible stories.

 No one ever stops and asks,“Did Mary have set life-plans and goals when Angel Gabriel showed up?”

Newsflash, she actually had plans. She really did. She wasn't just lying around waiting for her uterus to house“the One” who Isaiah prophesied about. She had plans! Plans to marry Joe. Wedding plans; the dress; vendor drama: Titus, the photographer, Marina, the cake sculptor; would she carry a bouquet of orchids or lilies? She had plans to build a home. Five-bedrooms or four? Minimalist or strewn with rustic mediterranean sculptures?! She had plans to have kids. Twin girls, then twin boys? Maybe triplets? She probably knew their names in her head. She probably had career goals too. Start-up or 9 to 5? 

Then comes Gabriel with a message from God—a plan from God. A very, very unusual plan. The ultimate flip-the-script-of-my-life plan! A meek and obedient virgin she was, but you must be kidding if you think she didn’t mull this new plan over in her mind. Her mind could very well have exploded with this ludicrous plan, thoughts colliding in her head...

“This plan may cause Joe to dump you like a hot potato,”

"Start up suspended for now."

"Do they sell maternity wedding dresses in Nazareth? *Gasp!* Will there even be a wedding?!"

“Your star-virgin reputation will surely be drenched in gutter goo now.”

“Amara and Dorcas will never believe”,

“Oh, yeah. Your first kid with Joe, who you dreamt about meeting all your life isn't going to be your first kid after all"

"Mae, you had carefully selected the name Michael-John-Scott-Afolarin as your baby’s first four names but that won't fly. His name is to be called Jesus.”

On a grander scale, another thought must have loomed, in the shadow of which the other thoughts would have paled: 

"This is a suicide mission."

According to Jewish law, a  woman who is pledged to a man, and then steps out on him, visits some Billy’s tent and gets pregnant will surely be stoned. Joe had every right to have her stoned.

She must have thought about these things. The Bible doesn't describe the internal struggle, still, I bet it was there. But she did it anyway. She humbly accepted God's will and suspended hers- a remarkable show of faith in the unseen. 

She laid aside her plans to be used by God. Interestingly, she wasn’t only a portal through which the savior was born, but she followed through on Jesus. She raised him(she could have abandoned him under a bridge and gotten on with life), but she was there throughout his life, even at calvary, she was there at the cross. She didn’t abandon this divine project. She laid aside her life and plans to be used for the project of salvation.

I don’t know about you but I’ve had plans and preferences since I was 2 years old. 18 months, actually.

However, God has a plan too; he’s had it for ages—before the foundations of the earth were created, he's had a plan. He offers it to me all the time but I stare at my own highlighted, segmented, neat blueprints, and many, many times I say through my actions, “God, your blueprints make no sense to me. They aren’t even blue! I can’t. Sorry. Shoo, Gabriel!”

I have fixed my ways.

His plan is always unique…and a little weird. That's what makes it so intriguing and perfect.  Don't try and understand it. If Mary and Joseph tried to understand, they’d have gone crazy. Trust in God’s plan; if it isn't weird, something is off. If it isn’t crazy; if it doesn’t defy the Law of Cause and Effect; if it doesn’t require faith; if it doesn’t make people mock and despise you, then bleh, clearly then it’s your plan. Ditch that, take on God’s plan. Trust in the unseen! You won't regret it.

How are your life plans coming along? Have you considered God's plans too?

Beard Envy

Ed and I once met this guy with a beard, a beard like nothing we had ever seen before. It was jet black( fiercely so), full, light reflected off its healthy sheen that from a particular angle, you'd think the hair was white. We decided to ask what his secret was. "Coconut oil", He said. Nothing else. He couldn't do anything wrong in my eyes with that beard. Of course, we both took a picture with him (not him really, but with his beard).

So did Ed have beard envy?

No, Ed didn't have beard envy. I did. I wondered, "How could someone have such an awesome beard and I don't?! All that awesome chin hair."  If that guy ran for the presidency, he'd win. No joke

I know. I know. I'm female. But that doesn't matter! Why don't I have that beard?

Why don't I have a beard?

Sulk.

Irrational? That's exactly what our thoughts sound like when we envy other people. 

Lol!

Why don't I have that?

Envy is a show of discontentment with our present circumstances, which could be a good thing if properly addressed. Envy makes us lose sight of who we are, what we have, what we are able to achieve, what we represent. 

Let's say I decided to lose sleep over getting a beard and started rubbing coconut oil on my chin. Imagine if my chin is still hairless after a year? I’d get frustrated and bitter, and every time I see the guy with the presidential beard, I'd go bright green with envy- getting all green in the face for something that isn't tied to my destiny and purpose. 

Do we ever wonder what our path should be in life and if we are on it? Or do we veer off by staring at someone else fulfilling their dreams, envying them?  What if you don’t need that person’s endowments to achieve your goals? What if I don’t need a beard to be great? Envy has never driven anyone to pure success. Instead, it has driven many down dark paths in which most of their dreams are mediocre and unrealized and they forever sit on the sidelines of someone else’s race, hoping to get on their own tracks but they never do. 

I've stopped pining for beards and the awesomeness of others, instead, I celebrate my bald chin and all the treasure that exists within my being.

Edited at Will Rogers Airport, during a 9-hour flight delay.  

Promises, Promises And Why God Makes Them

Imagine God promises you something, anything. Let's say... hair. He promises you hair because  you are going bald and you’ve refused to eat for two days because of this. So he says, “Behold, my balding child!” In His earth-quaking voice, “I am going to give you hair, and fill up those bald spots! In fact, I’m going to give you a full head of hair; hair that’ll make Jon Snow weep!” 

What do you think will happen?

Well, there’s a likelihood that those adorable tufts of hair may not sprout instantaneously. 

In my experience, when God gives me a promise, everything, and I mean EVERYTHING goes way south. It looks like the exact opposite of what He said, no sign of His promise. Nothing. It’s a dry, dry desert.

I believe He gives us promises because He knows we’ll need it down the line. We’ll need it to encourage ourselves, to stand firm in the capability of His power, and anticipate the splendor of His creative work.

If He tells you He’ll supply all your needs, at some point, you may not feel supplied at all. If He promises you hair, you may become Varys before you become Better-than-Jon Snow(enough with the GOT references, Ike). Bottom line, you may become completely bald before you get a chance to toss those locks in the wind.

At that point of complete baldness, you may not have what you want, but you have something pulsating with an inherent potential of God’s power— a promise! He sees the future and He knows things are going to go very South. He expects us to grab that promise, stare at it, speak it, shout it, write it, mutter it, imbibe it, own that promise until we are breathing and living in its reality.

God once gave me a promise and it did not look like it for a long time. Just like David or Abraham or Joseph, each of these guys waited at least 10 years before the promise was realized. Abraham waited until he was 99! David waited, running around in the mountains and the desert for years, trying to escape Saul, even AFTER David had been anointed king by Samuel; Joseph was sold as a slave, and he went to jail before all those stars bowed to him.

These 3 men had a promise each. There is a promise. Then there’s the wait or the trail. You must hold on. You must. Otherwise, what are you gonna do?

Why should you hold on? Because when the trial is over and you have won... there will be Isaac. There will be no Saul, and your greatness will exceed those before and after you, as was with David; never lost a battle, never lost his city, arguably the most respected king in history. When you wait out the promise, the stars will surely bow and so will the moon and the sun.  

This is what happens to those who wait for my God.

Burning Bridges For Breakfast

We’ve all met a few people in our lives that really deserve to be left on the other side of the pond…permanently. No communication, no contact. Just simply severed off from our lives. I’ve always believed in burning bridges, especially when the person has messed up on a grand scale, grand enough for me to applause this offense as epic. 

In my defense, I do give a considerably long rope; I consider strike one, a human failing. I consider strike two, a one-off; strike 3, a glitch in character; strike 4, she’s-just-having-a-bad-day; strike 5, just needs a squirt of grace and tolerance and a quick shine; strike 6…silence and observation as this person's attitude tilts dangerously towards epic. By strike 7 though, your name just became Felicia (bridge goes off in flames, as I walk away in slo’ mo). I actually enjoyed burning bridges. I had become so good at it, I could do it in my sleep. 

One of the things I’ve been learning this season of introspection is learning not to burn bridges. Don’t burn bridges. Why?

You may be all that person needs to be a better person.

Who cares if they become better? You may wonder(My previous sentiments exactly). Well, this much I can say, there is something about reconciliation. The whole point of Jesus’ mission was to reconcile us back to God. Forget the barbecued fishes and the miracles, the water walking and the turnt crowd as he rode into Jerusalem. He simply did all that to reconcile man to God. Reconciliation.

There is nothing more precious than reconciliation. If there’s someone you are holding a grudge against, someone you stopped speaking to because that someone pushed their luck up to strike 19, please consider mending.

Try. Don’t burn the bridge. And if that bridge has already gone up in flames, pray for strength and lay the first brick to rebuild.

"But she messed up! Why do I have to lay any stone at all?” Remember we messed up first too, we burnt our bridge connecting us to God. Lit that baby up! But God made the first move, and wrote himself into our stories. He made us right. He brought reconciliation into our world and we have never been the same since. Grab the first brick. That moment you set your first brick, hold your breath because you are about to be amazed by the ridiculous amount of light that floods your soul.

Did you miss the first entry on the new fiction series, Love Bite? Not a problem, read it here! And watch out for entry 2 this wednesday.

Salome’s Story | The Flash-In-The Pan Performer

Imagine that fine day in Jerusalem, you and I are at Herod’s party sipping our glasses of Pinot Noir, as we gobble up our array of Mediterranean-style cuisine. Everything is going great- it's Herod's birthday, the food is being wheeled in by the second, the drinks flowing, music playing, John the Baptist is in the dungeons below, but still everything is going well.

A dance performance is announced by a colorfully dressed servant. Herod’s niece and step-daughter, Salome, appears on the center stage. We are stunned by her excellent dance techniques, standing on her toes one minute and her elbows the next, twirling her flaming hulla hoops, all with the vigor of Beyoncé and the stretchiness of Ciara, spinning, transitioning into some ballet-krunk footwork; throws in some moonwalking into that medley.

We are all fascinated by her superior motor skills, of course.

The King, himself, is visibly impressed, red in the face, eyes glassy with pride and lips wide in a smile. He's also probably a little drunk, and his next proposition gives some evidence to this.

“Ask me for anything”, His voice thunders, all at once offering everything and nothing at the same time.

All heads turn to look at him and back at her. The whole room is silent, so much that we could hear a pin drop.

“Go ahead. Ask away! I'll give you up to half of my kingdom. Just ask!”

The girl is shocked. She had skills, she knew, but to be rewarded with half of the kingdom! We sip our wines, wide eyed and expectant. What would she say? This girl could be our queen by nightfall, depending on our postal codes.

Sip.

Everyone’s breath is held.

No one speaks.

We only hear our thumping hearts and the labored breathing of the dancing girl catching her breath from the activity and now this proposition!

She doesn't know what to say. Eventually she manages,“Please give me some time to make my decision.”

Smart woman.

She retreats to her mother's side.

The silence erupts into murmurs. We are excited and mildly terrified. Our political system now sat in the balance with this inexperienced girl up for Queen, no thanks to our mildly intoxicated king and this girl’s superior stanky leg dance moves.

What did this mean for us?

Would she increase taxes?

Would she subsidize our donkey hay?

Would we have more public holidays?

Would we have Monday's off? 

She returns.

The murmurs quieten; with the look on her face, we are certain she has decided to be queen of half of the kingdom and the issue of donkey subsidies would be debatable.

“I want the head of John the Baptist on a platter?” She sounds unsure and looks at her mother, who nods slowly. 

Our blank stares are epic. Your mouth is wide open. I push up your jaw and close your mouth shut. The hall erupts in chaos.

She can’t be serious! John?!

First, John is such a cool guy! Who'd want to kill him? The only reason he was in prison was because Herodias* wanted him there but also, the king loved to visit him in prison, hang out and ask him questions that puzzled him.

We all love John! Well, not all of us, but most. What was this child saying?

The king is distraught, hey, but his word is his word, whether under the influence or not. So a few moments later, John’s head is on a platter.

The end.

Head. Platter. End of party.

The most intriguing and disturbing part about this occurrence is that Salome could have asked for anything. ANYTHING; but she asked for something that held no meaning or value after 2 minutes. I get what they were going for-- some drama, some intrigue, some lip-trembling theatre and they achieved this for about 15 seconds, but the moment they cut his head off, the value of that head decreased by 1000% - and that was how Salome never became anything greater than a flash-in-the-pan dancer, forever lost to obscurity because she asked the wrong person for advice. She could have been queen. A renowned dancer. A warrior, maybe. A Queen-warrior-dancer but no, she had to ask for advice from some woman who was past her prime and buried in bitterness, a woman who lacked judgement.

The women in this story are just plain sad. They really could have been something, maybe Queen and Queen-Mother. Two weeks after, they were still Heroidas and Salome who depended on Herod for money to buy earrings and ankle bracelets. Hurrah, at least they still had the rotting head on their dresser. A few years later, Herod died, and with him probably died their livelihood. Tsk. 

In life, we get the opportunity to become what we were destined to be; this very important moment presents itself to everyone and is dependent on two things: time and chance. 

It all aligned for Salome that day, the entire universe aligned, breaths were held, the silence throbbed. All she had to say was "Half." 

She didn't.

She took the wrong advice. Seek out your counsel wisely, there are so many influences out there. Seek out the right influences and advice cautiously, think it all through. Weed out your Herodias and watch the universe align as you walk into your destiny.

Sipping that Pinot.

What are your thoughts? 

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*[Quick backdrop, Herodias got married to Herod, her brother-in-law and moved into the palace with her daughter, Salome. John, the Baptist called them out and said it wasn't lawful for them to be married and found it eeky. Herodias held a grudge against him because of this and when the opportunity arose, she asked Salome to have him beheaded]

The Queen of Sheba | In Pursuit of Wisdom and The Ladies' Man

In my books, the top 3 fashionistas of the Bible, would have to be The Queen of Sheba, Queen Vashti and maybe, the virtuous woman, maybe. The Queen of Sheba (QoSheba) has my vote as number one.

In my children's bible, she rode into Jerusalem on this magnificent elephant draped with Persian rugs; jewelry dangled from the elepahant's large ears and a huge jewel sat between its eyes. She, of course, was fabulously beautiful. She sat in a shaded carriage on the back of the elephant, her shady, ebony skin peeked from underneath a long, gold, silk dress, her neck was wrapped in a gold neck piece that sat just above her clavicles. Hair was endless, nails coated, lashes for days. Wrist, arm and ankles clasped in gold cuffs, huge hazel eyes peered from behind the gold frills of a sheer veil. The Bible's number one stunner—or so she thought, until she met Solomon.

I've been a little obsessed with the Queen of Sheba in the last few weeks. I love her story because it is unique and because I'm very much in her shoes right now (I'll get to that later). She's my Bible crush these days because she did a remarkable thing and because of that got her name into the most read book on the planet.

But first, my personal thoughts about her, I think the Queen of Sheba was a hater— beautiful and stylish—but a hater, nonetheless. 

It's recorded that she traveled a great distance to test Solomon with hard questions. She wasn't going as a fan, she wasn't going to hang out with the coolest king on the planet, she wasn't going for a snapchat-story or so she could tweet about it. It seems this queen was coming to Solomon to debunk this larger-than-life reputation of his. Uhh..feisty. 

Note, she was traveling on an animal, which is no Bugatti. Travel time must have been months or even years. She was coming to see who this Solomon-guy was. Wisest man her foot. 

I imagine her rolling her eyes when her courtiers talked about Solomon and how awesome he was and the splendor of his palace, his city, his servants, his clothes, his God— his God had given him so much peace, even the most violent kings loved him. His food, his chefs, his gardens. Oh...and when he spoke...all the court maidens swooned and the girls couldn't keep their hands to themselves.

"I heard he is the wisest person that ever walked the earth!" Her court gossip-blogger would have said with twinkling eyes,"I also heard...he's dating 700 women...all at the same time! And his 300 wives know!" This was probably the moment the Queen of Sheba said, "You know what, I can't...I'm going to meet this guy you're all talking about, 1000 women! Yeah, right! And they all know?! Unbelievable." 

She got to work with her "philosophers" and "wise men", did some research and came up with some difficult questions for Solomon, which must have taken time and considerable effort. 

Her plan: She'd ride into his city, find at least 1 fault, stun him with her questions and leave. So girlfriend got on a horse, donkey, elephant, something, and began her journey.

Her entourage was unmatched. She traveled in style. She was there to impress, her defenses were probably up, so she didn't become Girl #1001. When she got there, it turned out all she had heard was a lie and that his kingdom was even more awesome than described! Even his servants looked great! Everything was functional, hinged on the wisdom God had given Solomon for administration and governance and she was so impressed that she praised HIS God. She couldn't help it! 

Even though she may have started out planning to test this wisdom, she later opened up to Solomon. She chose to be vulnerable and asked him some personal questions that she needed answers to. He answered those as well! I think at that point she became even more beautiful to me.

QoSheba made it into the Bible because she sought out wisdom. She could have stayed back in good ol' Sheba, gotten a manicure and chewed on red grapes and we would never have heard about her . I love that she saw the value of wisdom, and put in quite the effort to uncover it. 

Whether or not she was a hater initially, it doesn't change the fact that she traveled thousands of miles to see Solomon, to hear this man who everyone talked about and to witness the awesomeness of his God. She stopped being a hater (hating is so pre-historic-era anyway) and honored God by giving him praise for Solomon's success. It take a whole lot of character to thank God for another's success. I just love this girl. 

This journey was life-changing for her. It must have changed the way she thought, the way she governed, even the way she would choose her King (if she didn't have one already). She left Jerusalem with so much stuff, treasure, gold, I-love-Jerusalem T-shirts, precious stones. It's recorded that Solomon gave her everything she asked for. That's the thing about wisdom, if you seek it and treasure it, it will give you riches, that's in Proverbs 3: 13-16. I'm not making this up! An encounter with God's wisdom changes everything!

This season, I have so many questions I'd like answers to—just like QoSheba— hard questions; I have to make decisions that require the application of wisdom. Do you have some too? Some funky dilemma getting you down? You need to choose between Richard or Debo; or both Joyce and Temi were your Valentine's, you just couldn't decide; or you need to choose between two job offers, or three schools or you just need direction in a situation. Instead of traveling to see some wise man these days, all we need to do is ask for wisdom for ourselves, so we can make better decisions. We need to see the value of wisdom like the Queen of Sheba did, then ask for it.

Just ask him for wisdom. He knows the outcome of every choice. Still your troubled mind and ask.

If you ask, you will receive.

What are your thoughts? Wasn't the Queen of Sheba everything?! By the way the BBC thinks the Queen of Sheba may have been Nigerian! Read here!

If you know this could help someone, please share!

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Cover Art by the wonderful Nigerian artist, Ruthie Akuchie! This Queen of Sheba piece was one of the 29 art pieces painted in 28 days to honor black, female leaders Ruthie's inspired by, honoring the Black History Month. Read her feature  here!

Airbnb with the Devil

As a child, my dad would tell me very matter-of-factly, that if the sun went down on my anger, I would give devil a chance to come and hang out with me. Lol! Scared me out of the planet and back. Pop was right. Recently, I let the devil Airbnb with me. I got upset with someone, and it became a deep hurt, that soon got out of control.

A few suns did set on my anger unfortunately, and then the devil stepped in; dragged his Prada luggage into my space and kicked off his shoes. He talked my ear off about how I was right to be angry and actually quite justified at such underserved insolence! Even God understood my anger, he would say. He warned me about letting people in, people were just wicked opportunists. They were all the same -all this he tut-tutted, while he's making himself a sandwich in my kitchen and sipping some tea, wearing my house robe and totally feeling at home.

In case you didn't know, Satan doesn't travel alone. Just saying. He has baggage (we all know that), he also has an entourage. Stop and think about that. Think of the scariest movie you've ever seen, the creepiest movie... The Conjuring, The Exorcist, Ouija...yup. He travels with spirits like that. Not cool. Not cool.

Kicked them out one day, the whole lot of them- I had had enough. I remembered this post and it soothed my heart. Plus I recalled the scripture that says human anger doesn't achieve God's perfect plan for our lives, that sealed it. I would give mercy and forgiveness, even when it seemed undeserved.

Be upset, be angry but don't let the sun set on your anger. Please, I beg you. You'll give that weird guy and his goons a foothold. He'll bring chaos. He'll mess with your mind. He doesn't do dishes, plus he'll use your towel and leave it on the floor.  Don't say I didn't tell you.

“And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil// Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. For the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.”

— Scripture mash-up: Eph 4:26-27//James 1:19-20

2016 in Two Words: Plot Twist

If I could summarize 2016 in two words, it’ll be — Plot twist. I think I was done with it by May. The twists kept coming and I kept winging it like a pro. You can only wing it for so long, for ~365 days. At some point, you're bound to get a sprain (which I did). All this, clearly could have been duly avoided if I had done the most important thing at the beginning of the year:

Asked God for a personal, specific word for the year.

It would have made it much easier. Instead, I looked for words as the twists came. They worked, as always, but it was tasking.

For sure, this can't be the case in the coming year. 2017 must be renowned as the year we heard, we followed and we triumphed!

If you don't have a word yet—and I don't mean the general word announced at church on NYE, I mean your own exclusive, intimate instruction and reassurance from our heavenly Papa, please sit with Him this last few days of the year and get it.  It's important because when the plot twists come, then you can smack ‘em in the face with that irrefutable promise from your Father *smirk* Also when you have a specific word from God, you are able to mutter it beneath your breath or scream it out when things look the exact opposite of the promise; great way to look crazy, which I personally prefer.

2016 wasn't all twisty. It was full of so many blessed opportunities, travel, love, you (yes, you PGI reader), fun posts, new friends, old friends. One amazing thing I did this year though was teach my mum how to blog…on FaceTime! Lol! It was the funnest and funniest thing ever. It made me appreciate her so much. I couldn’t be impatient because I know how patient she was with me as a baby learning to walk, learning to eat, learning to pronounce! So with patience, I'd say, "No, mum. That's not your password." I guess now, we all know where I got my password-recall situation from. 

I'm grateful for the twists. The brought me to a place of serenity and clarity; so much that I don't pray to avoid the twists but I pray to be focused on Christ and to hold on to whatever he has told me about 2017. Do you have your word yet?

For more highlights, amazing plans for 2017 and more news please watch out for our freshly designed newsletters! 2017 is going to be so exciting! If you haven't subscribed, whaaaaa? Do it! Do it!