CSI Eden: Cain&Abel
Crime Scene Investigation Notes
Deceased: Abel Adam
? Wounds consistent with signs of struggle
Blood spatter apparent
Weapon: Rock
No human witnesses—sheep(maybe); God
Suspects: Eve, Adam, Cain (wow, 3 suspects on the entire planet, this should be easy)
Right in the middle of writing this CSI note, I got up from my desk, stood in the middle of my living room and acted out the entire story of Cain and Abel. Crime scene investigators do this sometimes, just so they have a deeper understanding of the crime scene. If my webcam was on, my career might very well be over.
This is how my one-woman play went; I started out acting as Cain (ploughing the ground with an imaginary hoe), then I switched to Abel, who is holding a staff and smiling sheepishly, and befittingly at his sheep.
Next thing, it’s offering time—Cain is running home to watch the next episode of Blacklist and remembers the offering-thing, so he runs past his corn field, grabs three ears of corn without stopping, dumps them outside the tent and does a blacklist marathon.
Abel, has been planning his offering for a while now, he has been feeding a few sheep a little extra to get them fat. He grabs the sheep, leads them home, ties them up to the tent peg and feeds them again.
The bible records that Cain offered his sacrifice first; I offer his first.
One of the most apparent things about this whole affair was how different their sacrifices were. Cain brought crops and Abel brought “fat portions of the first born of his flock”.
During the act of offering, as Cain, I knelt down, bowed my head and offered to God my scrawny corn ears but my offering act was interrupted by thoughts of Blacklist, those screenwriters are crazy, the last episode though — then I spent the remainder of the time staring at Abel’s magnificently dressed offering and comparing it with mine. As long as I stared at this imaginary offering of Abel’s, I got increasingly angered and envious, I may have gone over to it and kicked it over…just a little (I really get into character with these things). Later on, I hit him on the head and hide his body. Then I have nightmares. Loads of them.
Fact: The first murder ever recorded, was caused by comparison.
Compare
\kəm-ˈper\
verb
to look at (two or more things) closely in order to see what is similar or different about them or in order to decide which one is better**
Comparison is never without the elements of superiority and inferiority. The whole point of comparing is to see which is better or to see that they are at least the same and worthy of the same attention.
Comparison works in two ways, we compare, find out that we are doing better than the other person and we get complacent with a smirk on your face, which is a fool’s signature (not my words, Proverbs 1:32).
The other way comparison could work would be by discovering that we aren’t measuring up to this other person and then jealousy steps in, he/she becomes a reference for everything we do. You struggle and imitate so desperately until you lose focus and discover one day that you have lost yourself; your mission, your goals are all muddled up because you left your lane and are now on the sidewalk.
We choose how this ends. Cain didn’t have to kill Abel but he chose to anyway.
Jealousy is a crazy thing. It makes you lose the essence of who you are.
If you have been comparing yourself to someone or comparing your work to someone else’s, let it go. Your offerings are very different, no matter how seemingly similar.
I, later acted out Cain and Abel a different way. This time, Abel didn’t die. Cain faced his sacrifice, apologized to God for the shabby presentation. He appreciated the uniqueness of his offering and asked Abel for tips on better presentation. Abel got to have a wife and family and we kinda had another race of humans from him.
The End
Oh yeah, case closed! Cain did it. Note to self, do not compare all this awesomeness with another person's unique awesomeness. That just isn’t a fair scale.
*wink*
What are your thoughts on CSI: Eden? What do you think is the best way to deal with comparison in our crazy world? Has this helped in any way? Have you read this post yet?
{Author's note: Humans had been kicked out of Eden at this time; it was used in this post because it was the most relevant geographical reference at the time of this event. **Definition from Merriam Webster Dictionary.}
4 Reasons You Should Try 'Naked Thursdays'
It's time to eden-ize those Thursdays (or whatever your favorite day of the week is)! The scientific benefits of shedding your clothes and just air-bathing for extended periods of time are pretty great. I mean, God knew what he was doing when he plopped Adam in the garden naked and leafless.
Guy or girl; married or single; embracing your naked self is the way! Here are four reasons why you might want to toss them garments into the wind.
(1) Gets you closer to Bae
Being naked had to have had its benefits with Adam and Eve. Right?
Studies show that couples who cuddle or sleep naked experience an increased amount of oxytocin in their neural system. Oxytocin is the hormone which creates that feeling of vulnerability and trust. It also might be the key to exclusivity in relationships (i.e no cheating). According to this study, men who were given doses of oxytocin seem to crave their partners and showed mildly aggressive reactions to strange attractive females. In their words and i quote, the men "....preferred keeping a significantly greater distance between themselves and the temptress....." Ain't God fab? Made us naked, so we could cuddle and get flooded with oxytocin and be committed; everyone's happy.
Naked couples probably fight less too, yet again because they feel vulnerable and it's just not possible to take an angry naked person seriously.
(2) Makes you self-conscious (which is NOT a bad thing)
Being naked often, makes you body-conscious; it helps you appreciate those parts of you that have been hidden under all that fabric! It also nudges you 'to drop and give twenty' or for some people, tells you to eat a little more.
You can imagine that you'll also be hair-conscious.
(No more wax day postponing. The more naked you are, the more Naked Thursday doesn't look like a Tarzan movie set. By the way, Tarzan is out next year, I can't wait! It's pretty star-studded too. Samuel. L, Djimon Hounsou, Margot Robbie, Christoph Waltz! Christoph Waltz is the villain again! He's like everyone's sweetheart villain!)
(3) Healthy Loins (hehe, loins)
"Breathe Again"(*in TONI Braxton's voice*), this will be your lower regions song to you! Being naked keeps you aired out and fresh underneath, and who doesn't love that?
Un-aired, musky loins can lead to an increase in testicular temperature, which in turn could cause a case of low sperm count, we don't want that. So, get rid of the clammy and let it go, let it go, don't hold it back anymore!
Women also stand the risk of UTIs and infections with dark, musky crotches and this can be prevented by sufficient aeration and healthy breathing. Woosa, anyone?
(4) No Laundry
You don't have to think about that day's contribution to laundry or you can plan Naked Thursday on a laundry day! Everyone wins; your clothes are clean, you are airy and healthy, bae is happy! Just chill on your non-leather sofa and watch reruns of your favorite show. Try to avoid going to the kitchen; making ogi or custard or starch; frying; ironing; extreme sports; fights. You are several levels of vulnerable, so respect yourself. Lol!
When last did you try Naked Thursday?