Fun bits of Phone Dating
It usually starts with your friend saying "I know this guy you might like." You look suspiciously at her because that was what she said last month and following through on her recommendation, blind dates have now been tagged traumatic and a No-Na-ah for you. So skeptically, you eye her and ask that very question which we all ask at a blind date offer- "Do you have a picture?"
Clearly, it follows that any one eligible for phone-dating or blind-dating be equipped wth a stash of recent pictures (taken in flattering light and with minimal editing). Emphasis on recent, no reliance on old glory, y'all. It's a very pivotal moment when that person sees your photo and either gasps(good gasp) or gasps(bad gasp). Put forward your best photos. If in doubt, ask a friend's opinion, nothing to be ashamed of, I have a friend who I bother all the time. Sometimes you think you look like your favorite Eva but you don't. You really don't. Again I say, get a friend's veto.
A favorite bit of phone dating for me is the quality and pliancy of conversation. It was definitely more fun before social media, when we hd2abbrv8! Fun days. I guess many people think you're disadvantaged if you have to have conversations on the phone and not face to face. Frankly, I think it helps to focus on building the intellectual communication aspect of the relationship before you meet in person, get to know him/her before the physical element distorts it all. I'm not saying that being face to face doesn't encourage intellectual roots but it does get a little distracting when you just met and you're staring into those dark eyes, in that perfect face, on this sweater-weather day, while you get all the butterflies in your tummy. Flicker goes the flame of intellect with those darn butterflies.
Wait, random question, have you ever had butterflies while talking on the phone? I think I have! I wonder what the physiological interpretation of butterflies are. I'm going to find out and write a geeky post on it. I'm kidding, like I write geeky posts. Hmmph.
In addition to developing roots, it also helps mute ignorance...e.g if the person uses a big word you can quickly check what in the world it means! Lol! I remember a guy once sent me a message with this huge word. My friend and I scrabbled everywhere looking for the meaning of the word so I could send an appropriate reply. This was before smart phones so I had to actually check my dictionary! .........and now I've dated myself and everyone will know how ancient I am. That day though, thanks to the ignorance-muting effect of phone dating, i was able to respond with an equally big word which took him an hour to respond to! A-ha!
Another fun bit; phone farts and bathroom breaks. Have you ever been on the phone with a person you really liked, early in the relationship and you need to go? As in go, like #2 go? With #1 you can keep the person talking and mute the call so he doesn't hear you. But #2 is a hang up the phone situation. Don't try muffling the mic, muting or doing the tissue cushion trick. Hang it up. Do it.
If nothing has been learnt from this post then let this be your take away; Your sexting screen shot is a heart beat away from becoming a meme these days. Hehe.
Date with Decorumđź’‹
What is your best bit about phone-dating?
For de Men dem: Becoming Drogo
Two of my guy friends are growing their beards!!! Whohoo! I know.......they need coconut oil. That's what i told them too!
This is some Khal Drogo biz. I'm pretty sure Drogo uses coconut oil, guys. I like to imagine that after he runs around all day cutting out tongues of disloyal subjects and raiding and looting villages, he has some alone time with his beard, grooming and massaging with coconut oil. Some manly time.
So to all the men dem, growing a beard, get a jar of coconut oil. Its great anti-bacterial, anti-microbe properties keep your beard healthy! It's high in triglycerides which is great for growth. Also, it gives it a luxurious shine. If you'd like a bit more intensity in this care process, click on this link.....before I give you the link, if any of you guys have mocked the natural hair journey of your girlfriends or friends or sister or mum, or the hustle in general, i want to say with all the smug my face can contain......"In your face!" Literarily.
Alright, here's how to make awesome beard balm, with just oils. The same oils the natural girls use. You'll love it. You'll also love smelling like coconut. You'll smell like a dessert. I know you'll complain about how you smell but I know you secretly love it. I see some slathering some on their legs and ashy ankles, using it to treat baldness (it has been said to help) and as a lip balm. All that good stuff.
If you haven't considered growing a beard. Think about it. Girls love a good beard. They do. Maybe not all, but most. Studies prove it. So hey, the girls love it, Khal has one. Let it grow!
Please remember: Kissing a guy with facial hair is interesting enough, please ensure you clean your beard often enough when food gets stuck in it. No one wants to know you had Oatmeal for breakfast and Edikaikong for lunch.
All the best and please share with a #beardgang friend
xx
Ps: Jason Momoa has not admitted to these coconut-y allegations