Lessons from the Bosses of Spring Cleaning
Last weekend, I did some form of home spring cleaning, not because it's the beginning of spring and i adhere strictly to the spring cleaning calendar but because we can't find our TV remote! It has been missing for about 5 weeks now. Quite frankly, I don't know what to do, considering the fact that Game of Thrones is starting soon. Sigh. Anyway, this weekend, I plan to repeat the process. I'm planning on going into every cold, dark nook and cranny. I'm going to be so thorough even the founders of spring cleaning would be proud.
Spring cleaning is a practice that is believed to have originated with the Jews. These spring cleaning pioneers would clean their homes so intensely in anticipation of Passover, ensuring that their homes were rid of leaven bread or anything containing yeast. I always thought they just couldn't eat the leaven bread during that period, but actually, even pieces and crumbs of yeasty food couldn't be present. It had to be spanking cleaning! They even had a candlelight search of corners and spaces for these crumbs, much to the distress of mice. Now tell me if i look for my remote like this, wouldn't i have found it? I'm adopting these cleaning/searching practices immediately!
This weekend the plan is to spring clean; both the living areas and my virtual areas. My virtual areas are little more unruly than my living area. Here are a few areas i'm planning to systemically tidy, you could consider giving it a swab too!
1. Phone Apps: My phone looks like my App Store exploded. I need to arrange those accordingly. What does your home screen look like? Do you find yourself searching for an app?
2. Emails: I get about 40 emails a day. Mostly from people telling me to buy stuff; get 20% off this, 40% off this. No one ever says 80%! I politely turned down a cashier on Tuesday, when she asked for my email address.
No 80% off, no email. I'm kidding. It felt good turning it down though.
3. Communication and Affiliation: Toxic affiliations and influences need to be cut off. If every time you speak to a person, you feel awful after, it's probably a leaven-crumb situation. Sweep. That also goes for people who advice you without your best interest at heart. Sweep.
4. Mind: Out with the grudge specks and resentment crumbs. Sometimes, you can't stand a person and you think it's ok not to, until it morphs into hate. Let it go. Grudges and choosing not to forgive is so time-energy-health-and-life consuming. Why hold a grudge when you can eat sharwama after a spa day and dream about the day you'll finally get 80% off!
Please pray for me that I find my remote, I really don't want to buy another.
Something tells me that remote might be in the freezer....
What are you spring cleaning this season?
How to Get Him to Propose (Straight from de Men dem)
Hey, hey??! How did your Valentine's weekend go? Don't be disappointed if he didn't propose yesterday; he might have it scheduled for another date or actually, not at all. While the latter option just felt like i shoved an aloe vera stalk in your mouth, it might not be entirely bad that he doesn't plan to propose at all. In fact, if he doesn't plan to and you know, you should joyfully pack your pretty little things and head for the mountains! #DontwasteYOURtime2016
Last week, i had fun asking a few guys about the best way to get a guy to propose. Of course, these are completely their own views on this situation. First, they all agreed that a man can not be forced to propose if he is "not ready"; mentally and financially, which i believe is fair enough. They couldn't quite provide the perfect guide to getting him to propose but they attempted to correct some misconceptions women have about their proposal prospects and then proceeded to give some advice....
......They mentioned a couple of things we girls might be doing that may delay that proposal! Here goes....
“Nagging about it.”
“The sex. If I get the sex, i might take my time with the proposal- Why buy the cow?”
“If she’s dispensable and I’m just passing time”
“Playing house. Washing my clothes, cleaning my apartment and cooking doesn’t mean we are married or that I will propose.”
“You being impatient and complaining about how your friends have kids.”
“Conversation about your eggs...like seriously?...”
Then they provided some advice.......
“Stop waiting for a proposal, it just makes your wait feel longer. Make your own plans. Be busy, focus on your career, go for a Master’s program, begin your own business and channel your passions. A proposal should be an add-on not the main purpose of your life.”
“If you know a guy isn’t going to propose and you know you are wasting your time, you should leave”
“Wait until i’m ready....it might be 7 years”
“Initiate a Long Distance Relationship. He might realize he doesn’t want you far away. Who knows, he just might propose.....or not!”
“Do not be dispensible! Let him understand how valuable you are.”
“Involve Jesus! LoL!”
“Score Goal (get pregnant), he still might not marry you though. Lol! Ok, seriously, don’t get pregnant! *Straight face*”
“Develop yourself. Develop your inner beauty.”
“DO NOT NAG ABOUT IT”
Alright, so does this mean we girls are sentenced to being quiet about our concerns about growing old and our aging eggs and cannot talk about marriage at all with bae? Of course not! I believe at some point in the relationship the discussion about marriage should come up. It's important to know how serious this relationship is or what its prospects are. You deserve to know, don't be scared. Ask questions!
We girls get terrified of asking because we think he will run away. Let him run, it'll save you time. Ask him questions like; "What are views on marriage?", "Where do you see this relationship in 5 years?", "What do you want from me on the long term?" This should be a tear-free, matter-of-fact conversation; you shouldn't be trying to manipulate him, you should be trying to get information with which you will make your decisions. Of course, as a woman your intuition should kick in and you should be able to tell when a guy isn't particularly serious. If he isn't, you'll know.... we always know. In that case, as my Strategic Management teacher once said, "Sometimes, the best strategy to making a profit is the Exit Strategy." You might have to pull the plug on that relationship, if you know its going nowhere; from that move *deep breath*, full steam ahead and greater possibilities!
#DontwasteYOURtime2016
Thanks to all my interviewees! We have kept them anonymous-ish, much love and hugs for the advice, guys!
What are your thoughts? Do you think these really delay the proposal? What do you think about having the prospects-conversation? What are your experiences? Are men weird? Which is your favorite ring? Lol!
P.s: Ahem..Men, those rings up there can be found here, here and here.. just saying!
4 Surprising Things That Happened to Me in 2015
1. I became a Justin Bieber fan!
I blame his new album. I can't believe I started liking him! I had been so indifferent for so long but now I'm a fan of his music, I can't deny. After watching him perform at some show in New York during Thanksgiving, I guess it's safe to say, I'm now a bieliber...senior citizen's category.
2. I moved to a city that I had always flirted with but never really took seriously
Remember when you were single and you'd flirt with that cute guy at work, like every other day and then suddenly you guys are married...... in less than a month?
You don't?
Yeah well, something that unlikely happened to me. It was pretty weird. I hadn't ever imagined I'd end up here but i'm delighted i did! *Flirt* *Flirt* *Wink*
3. I had so many Action-packed dreams
This I blame entirely on my devotion to Blacklist and Game of thrones, more Blacklist though. Ed and I also watched mostly action movies this year, for some reason. Thank God, I had Downton Abbey to dilute all that adrenaline.
Hmmm....it would have been nice to dream about Downton Abbey though, drink tea, eat crumpets and weetabix and listen to Adele.
4. I twitted for the first time ever!
Ok, that isn't so surprising. Nope wait, it completely is! It's 2015 and I was still a Twitter-Virgin in October! I liked to imagine I was the only Twitter virgin out there but probably wasn't...*shrug*. Anyway, I'm now a proud account holder with 83 tweets, follow me @pagesbyike and let's get random. Another surprise: I had thought I would be a chronic twitter.....tweeter..... (do they call the people who tweet, twitters, tweeters or Twitties? Smh, I'm so far behind). Strangely, i'm not too addicted to it but i am developing this new love for it though.
What surprises did you have in 2015? Married in less than a month? In your flirt-city suddenly? Dreaming about John Snow's ressurection too often?
PGI's December Girl- Ike
If you thought being a student was fun and you spent it in a perpetually nifty state, looking like you just stepped off a runway, every minute of the day, put your hands up! ..........Now ignoring those people. Lol, kidding.
This month our PGI girl is someone, who does make student life seem a little more glamorous than I would imagine! By contrast, my student make-up life comprised of bad hair days, stress pimple surprises, some eyeliner (usually drawn in a hurry and all squiggly), brow pencil, a little mascara and a dab of Vaseline lip therapy. I'd eye the liner blunder, ignore the pimple, cover up with large geek glasses and burst out the door!
You see why I feel the need to honor all the girls who make the effort to look good to class or work or bed, even? A thousand salutes and loads of respect. It really is something to be admired and celebrated.
A couple of weeks back, I had the pleasure of chatting with the wonderfully stunning Ike Saliu, she's someone whose style I greatly admire. She has a fun and brave sense of style and upholds this all while being a student! In case you missed it, we have the same name! She's the 'Ike' that actually cares about her fashion life as a student; I wish I had her around during my bad-liner days.
She has huge dreams of becoming a TV/media director one day, a day not too far away. She talks about slaying as a student, her favorite make-up vloggers/ lifestyle bloggers and what she misses about Nigeria.
Let's meet her!
Where do you go to school?
York University, Toronto
What are you studying?
Human Resource Management
What's your morning phone app sequence?
First, I reply messages i left hanging after falling asleep; then What’sApp, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Tumblr. Pose. Then my Bible app, then Elevate and Lumosity for my regular brain exercises.
Your student life makeup fix?
I draw my brows (they’re essential), apply foundation, set it with powder. If I am having a presentation, I’d put on eyeliner, apply blush and put on a nude lipstick but if I’m not, I'd simply use mascara. I usually go with a natural look for school.
How long does it take you to get ready?
1 hour, 30 minutes, if i have braids on. If I have a weave, 2 hours because i have to style it. It takes me 30-45 minutes to wear my makeup.
Favorite Makeup Vlogger?
I LOVE talking about my favorite YouTube make-up artists. I watch an awful lot of them but my two favorites would be Msrosposh and Sonjdradeluxe.
Recommended makeup remover?
Biore or Global beauty care make up cleansing wipes.
Clothes or Makeup?
I finally know what it feels like when people say they’re in love with two people. *laughs* I love and i’m crazy about both equally! That being said, if I am to pick, I’ll go with what had my heart first, since i was 6 years old; Make up
A makeup mugger is trying to steal your makeup purse, in a dark alley. He gives you a chance to take 3 items from it. What would they be?
Oh, this is a hard one, my Guess by Color Pop Lipstick, my eye liner(i feel naked without my liner) and my brow pencil, i can't go out without brows. Also this pencil can't be gotten in Canada, so respect that and step away, mugger.
Favorite nail polish color
Burgundy!! I also like purples, pinks and blues
What song describes you at 5.30AM?
Future ft Drake , Where Ya At? Tbh it describes me 24/7
Night time habits/routine?
When I get home, the first thing I do is open the pot/fridge/cupboard to search for food or snacks (this is because I am always hungry, no matter the time of the day). *Laughs* I make some tea and change into comfy clothes, wash my face (make up or no make up) , clear the bag I took out (i just love my bags being empty), turn on my laptop to either research, watch a movie or Youtube video or complete an assignment. If I'm home all day, I’ll look for food as usual, wash my face and be on my laptop .
What do you miss about Nigeria?
I miss being driven in a car! *laughs* I miss that i don’t get taxed when I shop. I miss the hawkers (i don’t know why). I miss suya, agbalumo (the best fruit ever), Christmas at home, my mom’s cooking, my parents and friends.
Favorite Blogs
Kummy-kaybee.blogspot.ca, Pages by Ike (I love it so much), E-online, Justjaredjnr, Blvckcosmic.tumblr.
What are you reading these days?
School texts, ugh .
What would rather be reading?
I'd rather be reading the books in my cupboard and Malcom Gladwell books
What are your winter study time must-haves?
Tea. A show or movie during my study break. Snacks. Chewing gum
4 Things Learnt....
1. Empty my bag/clutch when I get home (maybe I'll finally find that tub of lip color I've been looking for).
2. Wash my face every night, whether or not i put on makeup during the day
3. Learnt that Ike likes Future! ....... at 5.30am! Lol. Someone's clearly a morning person.
4. It's possible to look good as a student
Thank you so much, Ike for being PGI's December girl!!! Love you!
PGI loves to honor everyday people who inspire. The great news is, we are all capable of inspiring!
If you would like to be a PGI feature or would like to recommend someone (male or female) who is inspiring in anyway, please contact me here, or send me a DM on Instagram . Remember to mention in less than 4 lines why you think you or this person is inspiring. Brag Away 😎
The "Let it Burn" Post
“You are a light.
I am a light.
So why is the world so dark?”
Ever since I was a child, I was convinced that everyone could see into my bedroom, whenever the light of my room was on. Later on, I believed people could see into my room whether or not the light was on.
The latter was caused by paranoia and by watching too many stalker-outside-your-window movies. Lol! So let's stick with the first. The first conviction has proven itself time and time again. It is the reason why on one very dark night, as i did the dishes at the kitchen sink, looking out the huge kitchen window into the neighbors' living room (unintentionally), i saw too much. Way too much. Way, way, way too much. So much that I had to suspend my chore, all because their lights were on! If you leave your light on, people WILL look into your home, hence the invention of window curtains. Use your curtains, neighbor.
The first is also the reason why i now live on the second floor surrounded by tons and tons of trees and I'm also a bit more careful with looking into lit-up homes....all that trauma. Cringe.
So what's this thing about light? Why is it so attractive?
Why does it attract so much attention?
Well, first, it attracts the observer probably because he/she is in the dark or in a less lit room;
Second, because the observer's interest is piqued by the illumination;
Third, because illumination promotes visibility and direction.
What if I told you that you were light; that there's someone in the dark that needs some of your light; that someone needs hope, needs to see what's going on in their lives and have a sense of direction; that you are a flare and that someone, people, even a whole community could be sprinting to your light?
So if you are a light, why is it so dark where you are? Why are people broken apart, staring hopelessly into space and defeated? I asked myself the same question and i figured it's probably because i'm right beneath my bushel, knitting and singing Taylor swift songs and way too self-absorbed.
It may also be because I'm operating on "low current" and giving off a flickering beam. I might not be consistently connected to the source of my light (God), not beaming as brightly as I should.
Today, I've decided to burn my bushel (good thing it's made out of wicker!)
It's all gone and encourage you to do the same. If you look around you, no matter what part of this great and magnificent planet you are, you will see darkness. It's time to burn that bushel, come on out. It's time to beam and give light, time to be a beacon of hope and love.
Let it burn, then let it shine.
xx
This is so me. Smh. Burn that Bushel ❤️
Do you know someone who needs your light?
Become a Blogger in 5 minutes!
This post took me about 5 minutes to read (and 2 weeks to write, lol), hence the title. I need to take out time to appreciate bloggers out there. They work really hard to ensure they provide the best quality for their readers , spend a lot of time getting posts together and usually don't go to bed until they know they got it right, only then, do they permit themselves to plop down on their with a smile on their faces because they know they have made someone's day. So, here's to bloggers out there!
I have been blogging for about one year now, actually 11 months. I seem to have fallen in love with it. From sourcing for a creative urge to sitting down in my space to build and design; watching responses and blog statistics; finding ways to be better; encouraging new and fellow bloggers; posting; interacting with all my great readers; giggling with people who send me private messages. I love it all and i'd be crazy not to encourage others to blog. Some people say it's therapeutic- the writing bit. I don't know about that, maybe, but I do know it's fun and challenging! Here are a few things i have learnt over the last 11 months both first-hand and second-hand, which have helped me on this super-exciting journey. Enjoy!
Set your vision and goals
A question i had to answer at some point on this journey was; what do you hope to achieve from blogging? My honest answer was and still is to provide a space where we all can be life/relationship hackers, unfazed by life's curve balls, which it throws at us all the time. Pagesbyike was created on that vision and serves as resource that draws from science, God, experiences and real people to provide its community with hacks! Understand what your vision is and run with it. Set goals to achieve this vision, then plan.....
Map out a blog plan
Something bloggers might struggle with is the consistency of putting up posts. We have other responsibilities that require our attention, of course and your readers completely understand....not! Lol! If they love what you write, they probably want it everyday, every hour even! Drawing up a blog plan to work with and setting deadlines, makes blogging much more tangible and manageable. I have learnt to always plan ahead, 3 months ahead. Having an idea of what you'd like to blog about ahead of time, takes out the initial nerve wreaking frazzle of the "What do i post?!!!" situation.
Choose your subject matter
Write what you know but also test the waters. There's so much stuff to write on. Choose something that you are absolutely passionate about, not merely just interested in. I am super-passionate about making better life decisions and continuous self-improvement but i am interested in food recipes. I would gladly read food recipes off another blogger but i might not last a week blogging about recipes. Know you passions and differentiate them from your interests.
Don't be obsessed with statistics
O, the statistics!! I remember my first month writing, i think I was my only reader, lol and of course Ed. I'd check the blog metrics and there'd be only two counts for visitors. Needless to say, it was quite discouraging but Ed would always say "Just write", I don't think there's anything more inspiring than those two words. It outweighs all the technicality and stats and helps to focus on the right thing; passion.
Know your audience
It's helpful to know the demographics of your target audience. Some blogging platforms provide the geographical locations of your readers (blogger, squarespace). Blogger provides a very comprehensive geo-location analysis of your audience. When we were on blogger, sometimes, i'd see readers in Russia, Senegal or Alaska! It was terribly exciting and it helped me understand that i had to be more dynamic with my writing. Knowing your audience helps you tailor your posts to their needs and interests.
Help me tailor yours, send me a message here!
Respond to all comments
From my statistics, i can tell you that less than 10% of readers comment. If some readers from that very small percentage choose to comment, honor their comments with a response. Also, as a blogger, make it a habit to comment on other blogs. My friend says its like a sowing a seed, it will eventually come back to you too. Another reason is that your comment encourages those bloggers and it may also direct traffic to your blog if you leave an interesting comment.
Do give aways!
Giveaways are a great way to engage your audience. True, there may be people who just stop by for the freebies but hey, haven't we all. No judgement. My first giveaway is coming up soon! Watch out for that...christmas might be coming a little early this year!
Thank you, to all those who comment ever so frequently!
xx
What is your favorite blog? Are you thinking about starting a blog? Are you a new blogger? What are your main challenges? How long did it take you to read this post?